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July 2015

Down by the Sea

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A couple of years back when I was wondering between jobs lost in the breeze, I ended up trying a self-employed Shop-fitting job that I found in my local Job Centre. I phoned and was successful after having attended no real interview (which should really have given me an idea as to the longevity of this job). Anyways, the job pretty much involved traveling to every corner of the country, then going in to a supermarket and smashing all the shelves to bits, disposing of them and sometimes replacing them with new ones. The money was honestly not too bad for what it entailed but the downside was the continual traveling and staying in hotels in the middle of nowhere with often extremely dodgy type people, I also had no idea how self-employment really worked at the time.

One upside of one of these trips though was crossing the path of a guy called Craig who happened to be doing the same thing as me. He was a really honest, open and interesting guy and I really had to admire his positivity, and work ethic. I remember him telling me of many of his money making escapades including one effort that landed him in the local paper..not for the wrong reasons. He had also thought long and hard and come up with a plan that would see him working alongside the opposite sex, so he could maybe also find the girl of his dreams whilst making the bucks I presume. The one thing I related to the most though would definitely have to be his recommendation to spend time by the ocean. It was his advice to visit the sea in stormy weather for ultimate clarity of thought and I really like that. On that particular trip we even had an indoor swimming pool with sauna and I can clearly remember on one of those trips all of us looking out over the ocean from the pier.

Watching over the ocean

I think the next time I traveled with the shop fitting ‘wrecking’ crew there was no sign of Craig and certainly no pool in our hotel down south. I think there was three to four of us booked in to one box room for this stay and I was sharing with three lads out on the piss every night. Let’s just say I didn’t get much sleep that trip and it was sadly also the end of my shop fitting career as I ended up resigning. I had to go to the nearest HMRC tax place and ask them how the hell I was supposed to fill in my tax return! In any situation though you generally find that one individual that sticks out and makes the difference.  This whole post also nicely ties in with my next move of hopefully serving as a Royal Navy Reserve and is maybe a nice twist of fate that has the potential to improve me in many ways.  This is certainly a position I would have respect for, I get to serve my country and acquire confidence and leadership skills. Hell it’s even a place that pays you to get fit and I can’t ask for any more than that. So maybe this time I will be hitting the high seas myself! Let’s see what the future brings.

HMS Manchester at sea

What keeps you going?

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For me it is not yet having achieved what I want to in life. In essence I believe this applies to us all really. We all need clear visible goals that we are striving to achieve. When I was younger I used to watch Dawson’s Creek. This seems like a very strange thing to bring up I know, but I loved that show. I could relate so much to the main character. Sure the franchise started to drag on a little too long and the characters (supposed teenagers) talked like college professors but the show was just so positive in nature and filled with great quotes- for people of any age – to carry with them, on through their life journey. I actually took my online username from the place where the majority of the show was filmed in Wilmington (North Carolina) although I spelled it wrong as Willmington..oh well.

It had great music as well. It’s clear that the creator Kevin Williamson and co had a love of music, which can be seen from the episode titles that often referenced the names of classic rock hits. It was written semi-biographically giving it much more power and credibility to me and showcased nature and tranquility. I’ve gone off subject here, but the point I wanted to make is that I actually take inspiration from Dawson (or Kevin, if we are thinking real life) following his career goals in life and the extents he was willing to go to, to make his dreams a reality. He had a love of film making and although it would seem more like a pipe dream to others, he made sure that this work would always be in his life.

Dawson, Joey and Pacey making film

Dawson the filmaker

One quote that particularly still resonates with me is from season 5, the episode ‘The Long Goodbye’. The episode deals with the aftermath of Dawson’s dad’s death after a road accident. A classic ‘flashback’ scene is used with Dawson remembering his dad walk in to his room and give him a camcorder to make films for his twelfth birthday. Dawson is overjoyed but also adamant that film-making is not just a phase in his youth.  “Let the things you love be your escape”

So here I am now, stuck in my mother’s house forced to listen to the ongoing arguments with her partner. Being helpless to have any positive influence of her self-imposed merry go round of misery. I lost my grandad last Christmas so now also often care for my grandmother, my dad past away a few years back now. My own relationships are far from great at present and I don’t really have anywhere to go get away from all this crap. But this is when it is most important to keep the positive messages in my head. I keep on working on the things I love in live as much as I possibly can, because I know this is what will lead me to a better life and to where I want to be. I’m making sure that I’m sticking to a productive routine and that I continue to work and improve myself whilst I bind my time to grab at my chances in life. I know that once I get a hold I’m not letting go.

Sun going down on the creek

Would be nice to walk out back to this everyday